As we move closer to Xmas and the New Year, alot of people move from 2021 into 2022 hoping for a fresh new beginning (post-covid). Me as well! We have lots of exciting things to look forward to in 2022. Our group is now at almost 700 students,(Unbelievable considering we started as a Covid Support Group) free classes at 10am to help anybody struggling. New Deep Yin evening classes for $7 coming in 2022. And our beautiful retreat booked in the Byron Hinterland at Gymea Eco Retreat & Spa from Oct 26th - Oct 30th 2022. (Click here for Gymea website)
Gymea Eco Retreat & Spa
This time of year can be difficult for some people. As a mental health counsellor I have spent a lot of time talking with people about their dreams and goals. In most coaching sessions I will be talking with people about their motivation for improving areas of their life, and what the action steps may be to begin this new journey.
For instance, it is extremely common in goal setting to create a 'preferred life'. And to put a lot of thought and energy into manifesting the life of your dreams. If you look at Instagram you will see every influencer playing on this very common vulnerability in us. And look how addicted we are to this habit of creating a preferred life, and how popular social media really is.
This preferred life is the life you 'should' be living, or 'could' be living if only you were able to manifest the right conditions, or only if this or that had or hadn't happened. For those lucky few who do manifest their dream life look the riches we reward them with. Look how popular and revered they become, like demi-gods and godesses. If the life you're living is not the one you would prefer you may enjoy the Buddhist explanation of the nature of craving.
Craving is in our nature, our DNA. From first breath we begin to crave warmth, food, love, air, nuturing. This craving grows and becomes more complex and we grow and become more complex, and as our central nervous system and brain grows and becomes more complex. These cravings the Buddha said, 'are never ending.' They provide a continious source of stimulation and motivation to go out into the world and 'become somebody'. This craving is literally hard wired into our nervous system to protect our life, which is why it is incredibly difficult to overcome cravings, even when it is in our best interest to do so.
Which is why it is important not to project into the future when you set your goals/dreams/intentions. Which is very difficult not to do. Setting goals and being future focussed are kind of synonymous, however Buddhism and mindfulness guides us to deeply care for this present moment. So it's important that we have the right intention in this present moment, this is where the Buddhist Goal Setting 101 is done.
Buddhism says, this 'preferred life' or second life is an illusion. It's a mind generated illusion. You have generated this second life out of your own mind and it is now your preferred place to be. It's like painting a painting and falling in love with it, and making this painting the centre of your every motivation and your ego. There is also a preferred person living this preferred life, and the amount of energy and focus you steal from one life to give to another cannot be overestimated.
We are taught to push, to strive, to drive forward, to move upwards. However Buddhism says we strive for peace in this very moment, and in every moment. So how can we goal set for a life of peace? We can care deeply about this present moment and care for it like a child or a puppy or a kitten, genuinely care of about this moment by practicing the 10 parmis will ensure that the next moment and the one after that will also be peaceful. This is the easiest way to goal set in this very day and to also reap the rewards straight away, you don't have to wait at all.
Have a wonderful Xmas and I look forward to seeing you all in the new year!
Big Love, K
Comments